This week is test week #1 of the 2009 season.
I know what you're thinking...How does this work when it's still 2009? The answer to that? My coach has magic powers...or something like that.
Anyway, today was swim test day. You remember me writing about this before...10x100's with 10 seconds rest in between. At first glance, 10 seconds seems like a decent amount of time to rest, right? Well you do this damn test and tell me how 10 seconds feels. Yeah, that's what I thought.
I warmed up and already had a bad feeling about the test. Call me Miss Optimism. You see, until 2 weeks ago, the last time I had swam was the last stroke I took in the might Ohio during a little event I like to call IRONMAN LOUISVILLE. But I digress.
So here's a short recap of the test:
#1 - Ok, let's get back into this...I feel ok.
#2 - A little bit harder, and seriously? I have 8 more of these??!
#3 - Ok this SUCKS. Lactic acid is building and I hate triathlon...I quit. That's it.
#4 - GET WITH IT ROBYN. Nearly half way. Suck it up, you did a damn Ironman for Pete's sake.
#5 - Once I finish this one, I'll be halfway! YAY! Wait...ONLY HALFWAY?!?!
#6 - Ok over halfway, here we go. I wonder who came up with this damn test anyway? I'm going to ask Coach because - CRAP I was thinking so much to myself that I nearly swam right into the wall...must...remember...to...flip....SOONER.
#7 - What's this, like 75% done? Wow am I ever optimistic. I'm dreaming of my Brownie Batter Protein powder...yes that DOES exist.
#8 - Ok this one actually feels good! Hey, one out of ten isn't bad, right? Ok, it is.
#9 - Oh man, I'm about to DIE. My heart is beating out of my chest, I sound like a 2-pack a day smoker when I touch the wall, and it's kind of embarrassing for people to see the personal trainer nearly drowning. Am I there yet?
#10 - LAST ONE! Only 4 laps. Anyone can do 4 laps. Hell Junior could do 4 laps if there was a Tiny Squeaky Tennis Ball at the end of it (see previous post). Ok, now 3 laps left. HOLY HELL my lungs are about to burst. I hope that dude I'm supposed to take the body fat on isn't here yet...ok 2 more laps...a 50! I can do a 50! Keep pulling...dammit woman get your stroke together; this is highly inefficient. Last lap. Kick kick kick. I think I just dislocated something that shouldn't have been dislocated...and DONE!
As I leaned against the cool pool gutter (spitting into the drain nearby with people looking at me like I was disgusting even though there were not one, but TWO band aids right next to the drain) I was so thankful to have a large lung capacity. It took me so long to catch my breath and I felt so out of shape, but also good that I was finally done with that. More importantly, I was very very happy that my watch didn't magically stop like it had done last week during a swim.
So, thank you Coach for finding this ridiculous swim test that makes my head want to explode. Next up...bike test. Another super fun "try to kill yourself in 20 minutes and tell me how close your heart came to exploding" test.
P.S. This is what happens when you give your dog a bath when its like -385 degrees outside...you must swaddle him.
...in a pink blanket.
...in a pink blanket.
2 comments:
Ugh, I hate that swim test. I hope I never do another ever. Seriously, for me there's no point. I'm either slow or slower. I bet you rocked it regardless of how long it's been since you were in the water. Does make me feel good to know that it's not just me who has been avoiding the pool. And you like swimming!
I have my test on Saturday. My biggest fear is that it will prove I was a better swimmer last year.
:(
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